Friday, 13 October 2017

Chapter 39

''Yu, mung tok sey cari gewe ko?''
''Takdop orang nok ko aku.''

It seems funny but it is true. Every single woman on this earth will think the same. This problem is quite serious actually lol. Lack of male friends, studied at an only women secondary school, university life with ratio of male to female 1:4, I got less chance to get serious with someone. Many people asked whether single women like us do not want to date or get married. Of course it is wrong. Who wants to be single forever or anak dara tua kan? It just the right time has not come. Yet.

24 years old already but no one have confessed to me that he likes me, except for a few boys during my primary school time but tu cinta monyet not counted ok. Frankly speaking theres no one would like to approach me apart from that one man who had told me ''Tipulah kalau aku cakap aku takde perasaan kat kau'' during my 3rd year in degree life, but then after finishing our study, he said he liked my bestfriend since foundation time, I wonder who gave that statement 2 years ago? Syaiton maybe.

People said ''Kau ni memilih sangat.'' Nope at all, those men I liked are not that handsome, and not that nice. People said ''Kau takde effort ni.'' Nope, I became so obvious when I liked someone, I also confessed for three times, for three different people, but rejected from all of them lol. I dont know why I got those rejections, maybe I am not attractive nor kind enough, or something wrong somewhere. Maybe I am more like moody, annoying and clingy type I dont know haha. Yup I know I am not perfect but so they are. Nobody is perfect. But still after that rejections I moved on and thought, ''Nah he is not the one. Tak mati pun kena reject.''

When I liked someone, just like other women, I stalked him to see whether he has someone or not. But the sad truth is most of time when I realized that I had feeling for someone, it was too late, most of them were taken already lol. I dont know whats wrong with me but dont care, I am still okay, just finee being single all this time until someone asked the question like in the beginning of this entry. ''Kau taknak cari boyfriend ke?'' ''Kau still tak de sesape ke?'' ''Kau taknak kawen ke?'' Blerghhh sape lah taknak kawen lagi-lagi umur dah menghampiri 25 tahun.

My mom also always asked me to look for someone, bingit telinga den tapi nak buat cemana belum sampai masa. She is being like insecure teruk after that betrayal thing, as she thinks that her daughter ni tak laku umur 24 tahun tak pernah couple hahaha. Aku buat lek buat cool ja but my mum is on the another level. Recently, she always chose my outfit when I wanted to go out with my friends and she always asked me to put some makeup. Padahal aku tak puas lagi nak duduk bawah ketiak umi, dia dah prepare nak bagi aku kat orang *facepalm*

Dear single women yang senasib with me, persuade yourself that you are not ugly sayang, it is just the one who realizes how beautiful you are does not come yet. All women are beautiful laa. Make a mindset that Allah SWT protects you from this sinful couple thing. When the right time comes, God will send you a prince charming who also waited for you all this time. Good things come with patience. Allah SWT saves you for the best man out there. Improve yourself to be a better Muslimah, a better daughter, and a better person. We ourselves do not know whether jodoh or ajal yang menjemput dulu. Do not too focus on this jodoh thing, dearies. #selfreminder :)