Thursday, 20 December 2012

Why?

Hai. Assalamualaikum :)

Esok nak balik Kelate. Tak sabor. Hujung minggu ni semua ada dekat rumah kecuali kak yong + abe Hisyam, of course. Yelaaa diorang kerja kat Sarawak. Dahla sibuk, susah kot nak dapat cuti. Tambah2 lagi kak yong berbadan dua. Perghhhhhhhhh tabik ah kak yong~ Pregnant masa housemanship. ;) Minggu depan abe (abang) kite pun nak fly oversea. Dia dapat kerja dekat Sandakan, Sabah. Haha. Oversea la jugak teww. Hampa pi lah semua sana. Pi la, tinggal kami dekat sini. Kesian umi ayah kalo diorang nak jalan2 pusing 1 Malaysia nanti sape nak jadi driver kalo tak de abe? :( Ahad ni kak Liya a.k.a bakal kakak ipar kite nak datang umah. Duduk situ sampai hari Rabu. Sebab nak jumpa abe sebelum dia fly ke Sabah next week. Huhu. Eh jap. Aku bukan nak cerita pasal ni tadi =..=

Semalam final assessment public speaking. Hukhuk. Nak tau? Hancusssssss semuanya, segalanya, and every single thing tau dak? Aku dah prepare. Seriously. Dah seminggu kot. Tapi semuanya hancussssssssssssss. Ku menyangka turn untuk kitorang present ikut tajuk. Tapi rupa2nya madam pilih random. And such a very very very 'lucky' girl who I am ! I got the second turn. Orang nombor 2 weh. First Maizah kena panggil. Lepastu "Next, let's call a point, Nik Amalia Nasrulliana binti Mat Zaib." Anjat boboi ! :O Tak sangka awal sangat sangat sangat dan sangat kena panggil. What the fish? Pi depan, aku kena nervous attack. This is the worst I think. Biasanya aku dapat jugak control masa tengah2 presentation. Tapi semalam rosak ! Punah ! Hancurrrrrrrrrr musnahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ! Suara aku ketaq + muka nampak kecuakannya bak kata kawan2 aku. Hukhukhuk. Dari start sampai lah aku habis present, the hall members were like, krik krik krik *angin bertiuppppp whooshhhh~* =..= Yela obvious sangat aku nervous masa tu. Then, masuk je tempat duduk aku, I was like, T.T nangessss laju2. My tears didn't want to stop. Dunno why. Like seriously a 19 years old WOMAN(?) nanges dalam kelas? Wakakakaka. Apa ni? Jatuh maruah darah gangster keturunan Nik :( Nanges nanges dan nanges sebab dah memang takleh tahan. Perghhhhh. Then tengok presentation kawan2 ada yang tajuk Children Nowadays Are Over Protected. Aku jadi terfikir asal aku manja sangat? Adakah sebab umi + ayah terlalu manjakan kitorang sangat2 dulu? Umi tak bagi kitorang buat kerja2 rumah. Umi did all of them. Nak keluar dengan kawan2? No. Kecuali tempat tu dekat. Nak kerja? Umi said no. Terperuk je dalam rumah. Depan lappy memanjang. So is it have made me having a low confidence level and being a coward girl in front of many people? Nervous aku semalam over sangat. Jantung berdegup laju mengalahkan masa tengok abang Medik. >////< Padahal dah banyak kali presentation. Ngeng. Orang laen semua hebat. Korang hebat. Ada yang buat spontan je. Sempoi je. Me? A very no. Or maybe? Emmmm Amalia, stop talking about it. Dah habis public speaking class kitorang untuk semester ni. Happy but at the same time quite sad. Madam Dina dah ajar kitorang banyak benda pasal presentation. But Madam, I’m sorry. Me unable to change my weakness. I was not a good presenter. I am not. And I know I will not be a good one. I'm just not more than a coward girl.

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